Welcome to the good life

It’s not easy to mentally recover when all I get are these constant reminders that bring me right back to the memories I’ve been trying to escape.

“how are you?”
“how do you feel?”
“have you been sleeping good?”
“have you been drinking fluids?”

I know that all that they are trying to do is make sure i’m doing ok and stay ok, but being reminded every day of the stupid disease that i have makes me feel like i’m not in remission. I just want to be able to go through a whole day with out having to be worried about. I want to not have to worry about my self and i wanna be able to think that i will be a healthy girl for the rest of my life without being nephrotic, but honestly i just have to live day by day hoping that it doesn’t come back and hoping that i stay happy like i am now. Right now i’m the happiest girl in the world but when you remind me i’m miserable and i remember the times when i wasn’t happy, and thats something i don’t want to remember. I just want it to all stay away, and not come back i don’t want it to come back.  And thats all i’m afraid of.

(Source: hopea-muste)